More Musings on a Blizzard

In the last 48 hours Storm Benedict dumped 18" of snow on us, on top of what we had last weekend and the day after Christmas.  We have more than 2' of snow in our yard, undoubtedly a record of some sort.  I ventured out of the house this past Sunday to visit my mother and found myself behind a van being driven by someone who didn't seem familiar with the area.  I noted that his right brake light was out and heard the still, small voice say "Be Careful".  I was careful for about 10 minutes, right up until I took my eyes off him to ponder at why there were so many cars parked on the street in an area that is usually empty.  Turns out that's the place he was looking for. When I looked forward he had stopped, his left blinker on and no right brake light.  I hit my brakes and the car started to slide, it was all black ice.  I closed my eyes at the last minute, gritted my teeth because I was sure the airbag would deploy and damage my face.  Remarkably I hit only the van and none of the cars on the street.  The airbag did not deploy and, though my car is a mess, neither of us were hurt.  The man I hit was actually pretty nice about it.  I hit the right side of his bumper, right under the light that DIDN'T WORK.  Okay, sorry, lost my cool for a second.... 
My husband came to my rescue, brought me to my mother's, we borrowed her car and called AAA for mine.  I told my bro & sis that I had taken one for the team as it's a way to get Mom's car away from her (she still is in rough shape, not even close to being well enough to drive, though she argues that point). 
My lesson in this:  Listen.  LISTEN.  Slow down and listen.  Since August I have tried to pack far too many things into every day to the point that when I find a moment and don't have anything pressing I am at a loss - I don't know what to do.
It is never too late to make resolutions (I am drinking more water and am not getting breakfast in the fastfood lane) now I am resolving to slow down and listen...

Musings on a Blizzard

Well, we survived the Blizzard of 2010, the day after Christmas.  The wind howled and the snow fell sideways a lot of the time.  It was grand and it was a little nerve-wracking.  The snow blower worked well this year (unlike last year when my husband first got it from a "friend"), we didn't lose the power - due partly, IMHO (in my humble opinion) to the candles & matches I had ready as well as a tub full of water so we could flush the toilet if the power went out.  I love well water though so living on The Edge is worth it!

Today the sun is out, my daughter & the dog are out playing in the snow and I cleaned the kitchen for the first time in days it seems.  The bread machine is cranking away, pork is cooking in the crockpot and I'm making very healthy carrots for dinner as well.  I just need to figure out a dessert to make all well in the world, well, in my little corner of the world. 

And that is where it all starts, isn't it?  If all is well on home base we can take just about anything that comes our way.  Is my life perfect?  Absolutely not - but parts of it are.  My daughters are healthy and happy; my husband has a job that he loves to go to each day; school is going well for me (yes, an old dog can be taught new tricks!) and, above all, I am happy.  There are many challenges - my mother is not well and, sadly, we think she's going around the bend mentally.  I believe we will be taking her car away from her this week which will undoubtedly be a terrible scene, but my bro, sis & I are all on the same page with this AND so is her doctor.  It is sad to watch a parent deteriorate.  I remember learning about Shakespeare's seventh stage of man in my english class in high school.  We go from being an infant to a child to a student to a soldier (and a couple of other steps I can't remember); but the seventh is we are a child again.  That is likely where Mom is headed.  This woman always prided herself on her intelligence - she could converse with the most learned and not sound like a dolt - and while a lot of what was long ago in her life is still fresh in her memory, the present is not. 

Lastly, I am thinking about the New Year and what it will bring.  I graduate in April - on to my new career as an esthetician (and the debacle of how to spell it...aesthetician or esthetician); my daughter will be getting her learner's permit and learning to drive (I might step up my drinking a bit to compensate, lol); we will begin looking at colleges and I am dedicating myself to better health with the first step of drinking more water each day. 

Life is Good.

This "Old" Brain

I began school to be an esthetician six weeks ago and, while I am enjoying the class for the most part, I never dreamed how difficult it would be with respect to homework and stretching my brain to remember the various systems of the body (there are eleven of them), the bones of the head and face (22 out of a total of 206 in our bodies) and the myriad of nerves, arteries and veins of which our bodies are composed.

I have not studied anything in depth in more than 30 years - okay, 35 - and it's tough!  Three hours of homework on average each night, taking tests (tests!) and I have to do a project on one of the systems of the human body.  I can see why people try to finish school before they get married or start a family.  That said, I'm doing well and am happy to go there each day and look forward to the more practical applications of what I'm learning.

Since starting school and exercising my brain I am remembering vivid dreams every morning, something I rarely did before.  I don't know what that's indicative of, if anything, but it's interesting.  This morning's memory was trying to put on a dress to take a belly dancing lesson and I couldn't find anywhere to get changed and when I did find a quiet corner I couldn't figure out how to get the dress on because it had a bodice and laces....it was all very silly.  I guess my mind is in overdrive...I'm sure Freud would have something to say about it but I'm not asking his opinion.

And the biggest question of all:  When I get my business cards done do I spell it "esthetician" or "aesthetician"?  My teacher prefers the latter spelling and that is what is used in most medical settings (that is not my interest), but she likes it because she thinks it's interesting and perhaps quirky in her mind.

My schooling will be completed in April and I will begin my new career - all part of finding my rudder.  30 years of being a secretary is behind me, it served me well but I'm done.  I'm more than thrilled about the next chapter.

Anchors are Important

Today is my daughter's birthday, she is 32.  How can it be 32 years since I first held her - her peaches & cream complexion, the longest toes I had ever seen on a baby and the big blue eyes - the time has flown.  Now she is a mom to two stepsons who call me Grandma and who bring me joy.  Life is coming full circle.

As I think of finding my way I think of my daughters and how they are anchors...anchors to give me pause to stop and think of what is best for my family as I try to find what is best for me.  And beautiful anchors they are! 

Were it not for my anchors who knows where I would have ended up?  I'm a Pisces - a dreamer and a chaser of dreams.  I don't believe the daily horoscope (though I do check to see how many stars I have each day) but I do believe in the traits.  Artistic, happy, placid water people - til you tick us off!  I was "ticked off" for many years in this life and some only knew me as that person.  Time, bumps in the road, intelligence gained and finding someone wonderful to share my life with have made me a nicer person, far less ticked off! 

I am grateful for my anchors and sorry for one that I lost...hopefully he will find his way back one day, I keep looking for him.  He will be 34 on Christmas Day, I haven't seen him in seven years.  We all have our own journey - but it's so much better if we share it with people we love.

Today as I stand looking forward, I am taking loving looks backward and seeing my daughter in my mind's eye as she learned to walk, started school, made friends, learned to do math, have her heart broken, graduate high school, graduate from college, survive a terrible accident, marry a fabulous guy with two wonderful sons.  As I turn to look forward again I feel great peace for what is behind me and great joy for what lies ahead.

Life is Like a Muffin

This evening I baked pumpkin muffins for my family to have for breakfast, some to send to my husband's office and some for me to bring to school tomorrow.  I've made the recipe before, so I whipped them together, pressed sunflower seeds onto the tops of the muffins and put them in the oven.  The house smelled divine - I was really getting into the whole spirit of the day, it being Halloween.  The jack o'lanterns were lit, I put candles out to guide the trick or treaters in and waited for them. 

No goblins, witches or scooby doo's showed up, much to my disappointment...we live between two neighborhoods so I didn't expect too many - last year we had eight.  I had hoped we would have some repeaters and some new kids...maybe next year!  I still had the muffins to look forward to...

I took the muffins out of the oven, let them cool in the tins for 15 minutes per the recipe instructions, then put them on racks to fully cool.  I made a cup of coffee for my husband and brought him a muffin, like a good wife...  A few minutes later I heard "Sue?  The muffins are stuck to the papers...but they're delicious!"  He then said maybe if they cooled until tomorrow they might come out of the papers more readily.  I tried one and he was right...about a third of the muffin stayed in the paper.  If I left them for a week they might come out of the papers...!

I will be billing them as my low-calorie muffins as 1/3 of the calories stay in the paper.  As I pondered this I wondered what my lesson was in the evening's events.  What could I glean from this in my quest to find my rudder? 

I came up with two ideas:  Attitude and Notes.  I will note in my calendar to begin Halloween preparations a week ahead of time so the kids can see as their school buses or their parents drive them by and they'll know "that house" will be a good one to go to for trick-or-treating.  I will note in my cookbook (we call it "The Book" because I write down all recipes that we enjoy) that this recipe is not one to use cupcake papers with because they stick.  I remembered that I didn't use the papers the first time...

Lastly: Attitude.  My house smells wonderful.  And we have a chocolate stash that will last a couple of months at least!

Were my preparations in vain?  Absolutely not!  Onward and upward!

Everyone Has a Story

One of my favorite programs is CBS Sunday Morning.  It's a 90 minute "magazine" that has 5-15 minute stories about interesting topics that are rarely controversial but always interesting. This past Sunday one of the lead stories was about everyone, regardless of where they live and their "station" in life, has a story.  Two locations were chosen by an astronaut who had a globe with him.  He turned the globe and pointed his finger to two different locations without looking and his choices were noted by his associate. A reporter was sent to the locations and upon his arrival in the two countries (sorry, don't remember those either) he picked up a phone booked, leafed through and put his finger down on a name.  The two people they interviewed had fabulous stories...simple people like you and me with complex lives like we have (and many of us think that nobody else's life could "possibly" be as complicated as outs...).

This got me thinking: we are a sum total of our life experiences and I decided to blog about one or two that came to the front of my mind.  The first was in 1964 and the Beatles were on the Ed Sullivan Show.  I remember thinking that these guys were WILD!  I was 7.  I had only been exposed to musicals (Sound of Music, My Fair Lady, Mary Poppins, etc.) and classical music but I knew one thing: Their music was fabulous!  And their hair was way cool.  I remember my mother saying "That crap won't last" and thinking after she said it that I hoped she was wrong.  She was.  And I was happy she was!

The second thing was the Northridge Earthquake in 1994, 30 years later.  I awoke to my waterbed sloshing like mad and thinking that my then husband was stuck in the bed, but then I heard my teenage daughter yell "earthquake!", it was my first and, happily, my last.  We were 30 miles from the epicenter but it still caused a huge crack in one of our interior walls but more than that, it put a crack of fear in my heart.  I had been living in the high dessert in California for 18 months and wasn't happy there, I missed New England and my family dreadfully.  When we turned the news on and saw the devastation I decided that, as soon as I delivered the baby I was carrying, we were packing up and leaving this Godforsaken place.  Sam Kennison, the late comedian, once said "God made desserts but he didn't intend for people to live in them" and he was right (in my opinion).  I cried for days, undoubtedly due in part to being pregnant and having crazy hormones, but also the instability of the ground beneath my feet. I was in a store when a strong aftershock hit and rather than retain composure and calmly walk toward the exit, I bolted and reaffirmed my decision to leave the State.

The reactions of friends were strange when I told them we were leaving.  The predominant thought was "You're going where there are blizzards and hurricanes!  Do you know that??"  They were amazed that I would choose to go there.  I pointed out that with blizzards and hurricanes we get at least 72 hours' notice.  Earthquakes might give five seconds' notice.  I'll take a blizzard or hurricane any day.

Now, of course these two experiences are not all that have made me who I am, they are just the first two I came up with.  (There are plenty more - like when I joined match.com and started dating...lots of stories there which I will share at some point in time...)

So, as people cut me off in traffic or are a million miles away in thought, I am thinking that maybe they have a life experience going on (or not!) and try to take everything with a grain of salt...or a bucket of salt...or some tequila and salt!

Progress Noted!

I have completed my first two weeks of school...48 hours of a 600-hour course.  The most glaring thing I have dealt with is three hours of homework each evening...  Oh and there's the keeping our smocks clean - they are white. White! 

There are a few things I've learned: the first is that most of us haven't changed our skincare habits in more than ten years!  And, I must admit to not changing my make-up application in as many years.  Perhaps it's time for a fresher look....  Lastly, not to bore anybody (myself included) there is no longer a need to pick or squeeze our faces...there are products that will do that and not leave scarring or draw blood.  Something to think about.

Lastly tonight my thoughts are on leaves.  We have just over an acre of land and it is heavily wooded.  Autumn is a beautiful time of year, the sights, smells and sounds are fabulous.  It's a lot of work, but I love it.  Tomorrow my daughter and I will get to work on mulching and clearing the leaves so that we can tuck the yard in for the winter.  (Something wonderful happens this year when I'm done with the yard work...I can begin making the space for my studio in our cellar...I get shivers of joy just thinking about it!)

Two nights ago I pulled into the driveway about 9:00 and saw our coyote, Wiley, running through the yard.  He travels alone and is, of course, very skittish.  Fortunately he and Roxy have not met up on the homestead, and although he is small methinks he would be dangerous.  Roxy, being a true boxer, would chase him down, right up to the invisible fence anyway!  It would not be a good thing.  So, while I'm happy to host Wiley's run each evening, I try to keep an eye out so Roxy is safe.